brother

Oh brother......



What could I say to you to bring us closer?

What would be your reaction, if I sat you down an expressed to you like real siblings do?



Would you wear a smile of a clown?

Or genuinely walk around happy that you and your sister are now at peace with one another.....



You see brother,



I feel like you an I are one piece, but missing important pieces...

We shared the same womb at one point; I came after you, which makes me, want to follow your footsteps...

But I refuse to follow footsteps I can hardly see!



It's like I sleep in the same room as the enemy!!!



We share the same mom and dad

And even though we don't talk much I know your Hurt, cause believe it or not brother I'm Hurting too.



You displayed another generation of life, an I feel like your son has brought little tiny piece of us together....



But what's together when are hearts are apart?

An what's apart when half of me is hiding in the dark?

And what's the dark without a light?



You see brother I'm

Trying to find the right light to brighten are relationship, but I haven't stumbled over the right set of batteries, nor could I dig thru my dignity an find the right way to use my pen to allow u to listen......



Until this moment.....



See brother



At the end of the day we are all we got,

And I'm

Hating it!!!



Got a sister brother......

Can't even tell u her last name!

Can't even tell u were she stays! An deep down I know that shit plays in your head...

Why couldn't dad be a dad and keep us all aligned?



They say family is important but u know like I know we don't know WTF family stands for!



Fam(ily)



I love you!



Yes brother we are all we have now......



(Moms got to live her life too)



So no matter what bridge your standing at an u feel like you’re about to jump, pick up the phone an call me.



If your about to cry cuz all u need is someone to listen, pick up the phone an call me.



If your stranded in the middle of know where an can't remember your way, home pick up the phone an I well track your destination down.



Cuz believe it or not brother I well not allow u to drown!



But, sad thing about this brother is u have a problem, that’s too big for you to admit! So until you fix it you and I well never have a healthy relationship!



(But something been bugging me too)



Ohh Brother I should of saved u before it was too late.....

I should have caught you before you took the enemies hand!



I should of let you know before u hit the ground....



I should of never let mom

Cry on those lonely nights when she was worried about u!



While I was taking care of your son, I should have told her everything was going to be ok.



But I had no words to say, so I let U step out not realizing it was to late to save you.



But mom needed to cry so that she can let go of the guilt she had inside..



(always blaming herself)



And you never even once told her you were sorry!



But I allowed mom to forget about what bugged me, and concentrate on you ...........



Missing a father we both never had! An I know u think that's not your problem but u and I both know it is!



And I know you remember all the words that were said from mom to dad, and all the times mom had to drag us out the car when it wasn’t her weekend,

So don't think your hard cuz I remember counting the tears that ran down your cheeks.



You had a ninja turtle bed, and me, beauty n the beast until we were 13! That’s how well dad kept up always thinking we were going to just be his babies......



And remember every time we would see him; he'd say how big we got? Probably because he never learned how to keep up, and never learned how to love us properly.



That's why consistence is a very important key in my life,

Cuz I’ve never had consistency....



And if you want to grow brother you got to learn how to let go...



And the key to success is perpetration,

Learning that nothing well be handed to you brother you got to work until your fingertips become torpid!



Almost until u can taste the blood from

Deep down in your soul, u got to search for the better parts of you step outside your element an reboot your self esteem, cuz I know what your weakness is.



You think your stupid!

But WTF does stupid really mean?

We are all gods children so there for we are as smart as we can be, never let anyone tell u u can't do something.



Let me stop there brother before you get to carried away, cuz u an I both know I'm far from perfect, I'm perfectly imperfect cuz this is how god made me, so there for I'm everything he created me to be so why would I ever let Any other human being put me down?



I'm

Trying to get you to understand brother, silent’s is the loudest sound...



So I hope you don't find it crazy that at night I can't sleep, cuz I can hear u screaming to be found!

(I'm just looking for my bother)



Loneliness hurts but they say it’s also good for you



If you have any information please let me know now, before it's to late to create a bond!



Brother......